The Fantabulous Chronicles

Ah, behold the chokecherries, those little rebels of the upper Midwest berry scene. These bad boys, also known as bitter berries (and with good reason), aren’t exactly the kind you pluck for a casual tree-side snack. No siree, that dry and bitter aftertaste is like Mother Nature’s way of saying, “Gotcha!” 🌳😝

But wait, hang on to your taste buds, folks, because these berries are like Cinderella at the ball when they’re transformed into a lip-smacking syrup or jelly. It’s like they put on their finest flavor attire and waltz right into our hearts and pancakes. 🥞🍯

Picture this: small trees strutting their stuff at 20 feet or less, donning a dark reddish hue that screams, “I’m ripe and ready, baby!” 🌳🍒 And guess what? These guys are the North American black cherry’s close cousin, like the wilder, edgier sibling who listens to rock ‘n roll instead of classical. 🎸🤘

Now, hold onto your hats (and keep your furry friends away), ’cause the pit and leaves of these party crashers are packing a little cyanide surprise for the animal kingdom. Yep, that’s right—poisonous vibes all around! 🐾☠️ But, while these chokecherries might have a dark side, they’re still the stars of the syrup show in the Upper Midwest.

Ingredients:
8 Cups Chokecherry Juice (1-2 Gallons of Unprocessed Chokecherries)
1 Package of Pectin
10 Cups of Granulated Sugar

Required Materials:
7-8 Pint Jars with New Lids & Rings
Canning Equipment or Pot large enough to submerge Jars 1″ in depth

Directions:

1. Chokecherries: The Odyssey Begins: Strap on your patience helmets, because we’re diving into the mystical world of chokecherries. First, wrangle these rebellious berries, waving goodbye to leaves and stems like you’re in a particularly tricky magic show. Yes, it can be as painstaking as untangling headphone wires, but hey, we’re in it for the adventure, right?
2. Berry Boogie in the Pot: Once your chokecherries have shed their leafy entourage, it’s showtime in the pot! Plop those babies in and add just enough water to give them a cozy soak. Fire up the stove, let them strut their stuff to a boiling beat, and then tone it down to a simmer dance party for 30 minutes. The result? A mysterious, opaque, and mauve potion that would make even Merlin scratch his head.
3. Sieving Extravaganza: Say hello to sieve city! Strain that berry brew through a fine mesh sieve into a grand bowl. And oh boy, we’re talking multiple rounds of straining – like trying to catch fish with a spaghetti strainer, you know, thorough and oddly satisfying. The goal? Get that liquid as sediment-free as humanly possible. Think of it as your syrup’s spa day.
4. Jar-tastic Rehearsal: While your potion cools its heels, whip those pint jars into star-studded shape. Stick ’em in the oven, set it to 180 degrees, and watch those jars shimmy. Meanwhile, let’s get those rings ready – they’re diving into a simmer party that’s just heating up. Simmer them the entire time while preparing your brew.
5. Syrup Sorcery Unleashed: Pour your warm berry brew back into the pot, as it’s time for the magic showdown. Sprinkle pectin with dramatic flair and give it a whirlwind stir and allow to boil. Then, it’s the sugar’s time to shine – a slow and steady sprinkle while stirring like you’re summoning a dessert genie. Once it’s added boil for a minute, stir, boogie, stir, and then, voila! It’s a syrup symphony ready for its encore.
6. Syrup Ballet in Jars: Here comes the star of the show, pirouetting into those pint jars, leaving just enough room for some syrupy twirls (about 1/2″ air gap). Wipe those lips clean, like the jars are getting ready for a red-carpet event. Crown your jars with a lid, seal it with a ring – not too tight, you’re not wrestling a grizzly bear, just finger-tight will do.
7. Jars’ Grand Aquatic Voyage: It’s time for the aquatic adventure of a lifetime! Place your jars into the canner or pot, adding water like you’re filling up a berry-filled swimming pool (top the jars with 1″ of water). Heat it up, let it sizzle and simmer like a berry sauna for 10 minutes. And remember, we’re going for a simmer, not a rave-level boil. Your jars are partying, but they’re not trying to crowd-surf.
8. Jars’ Joyous Return: Once your jars have been partying for 10 minutes, gracefully escort them out of the water like the VIPs they are. Listen closely, you might just hear some celebratory pops as they seal themselves in – like a round of applause for a berry job well done. Don’t panic if this doesn’t happen for a few hours.
9. The Sweet Victory Lap: The climax of our comedy of flavors! Give your jars the “seal of approval” test – tap the lid like you’re knocking on a secret door. If it stands its ground, it’s sealed and ready for the syrup spotlight. If it pops like a spring-loaded surprise, well, that one’s heading for a chilly retreat in the fridge.
10. Finale: Chokecherry Crescendo!: And now, the thrilling finale – enjoy your homemade chokecherry syrup spectacle! It’s not just a condiment, it’s the star of your breakfast show. Pancakes, waffles, toast – watch out, because this syrup’s about to steal the spotlight and leave your taste buds begging for an encore! 🎉🥞🍯

And there you have it, folks, our grand comedic escapade into the enchanting realm of chokecherry syrup crafting! 🎭🍒

But before we wrap up this syrupy saga, we’re dying to know: what kind of syrup wizardry do you work in your kitchen? Have you whipped up a concoction that adds a twist of the extraordinary to your culinary creations? Maybe you’ve given your waffles a wild makeover or your ice cream a flavor fusion that defies convention. Don’t keep those tantalizing secrets to yourself—share the syrupy saga of your culinary escapades in the comments below! 🥞🍦

And if you’ve enjoyed this whimsical journey through flavors and laughter, be sure to subscribe to our page for more delectable updates, outrageous recipes, and a generous sprinkle of comedy. Until our next flavor-packed adventure, stay syrupy, stay sensational! 🍯✨